There's this high school science teacher, Jessica Martin (Kim Basinger), who's kidnapped from her suburban home and held hostage in a musty attic as thugs search for something her husband has. Unable to escape, she resourcefully patches together a smashed rotary-dial phone and dials a random number. It's the cellphone of Ryan (Chris Evans), a laid-back California surf dude who's goofing off with his pal at the Santa Monica pier. At first he doesn't believe Jessica's damsel-in-distress diatribe, but after he hears her being roughed up by her captor (Jason Statham), he tries not to lose her signal en route to a police station and then takes off to save both Jessica and her 11 year-old son who's been stashed away in a nearby garage. And when a soon-to-be-retired veteran Desk Sgt. (William H. Macy) investigates her story, he too becomes a hero.

The silly, gimmick-y script is implausible from the get-go. I mean, what science teacher drives a brand-new Porsche, has a housekeeper and doesn't bother to go to work on a school day?

That Ellis' previous experience was as a stunt choreographer is evident. When in doubt, he throws in another car chase or shoot-out. As for Basinger's performance, it seems, literally, to have been phoned-in. On the other hand, the contemporary "cellular" humor hits the mark, eliciting more laughs than you'd expect, and Macy's always worth watching. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, "Cellular" is an inept, flimsy 5. This lifeline has a tenuous connection.